My Positive 2nd Birth Story

Early Labor: 10/29

The rule for going to the hospital in labor is 5-1-1… contractions occur every 5-minutes or less, last at least 1-minute long, for at least 1-hour. On October 29 at 2AM, I woke up to contractions happening every 7-9 minutes apart, 1-minute long. These contractions felt mild, like intense period cramps. Since I’m a 2nd time mom, I anticipated progresssing quickly so after 1-hour of contractions I called my parents to tell them labor was imminent and they should come over to watch Luke (our toddler).

One of my biggest anxieties as a second time mom was what we’d do with our toddler if I’m in labor in the middle of the night. This happened last time and was happening again this time (it’s common to go into labor in the middle of the night when your body is relaxed). The questions running through my mind were, how will we manage our toddler? Will my parents pick up their phone, will they get to us on time? Will we have to wake up our toddler and bring him to the hospital? Should we drop him off at a neighbors house?

After 90-minutes of consistent contractions that were ~8 minutes apart my contractions became sporadic occurring every 3-7 minutes apart, now only lasting 30-seconds long. I was so confused. My parents arrived at 4AM as I was in the kitchen eating. Last time I was in labor, I was famished so wanted to make sure I had energy and fuel this time since it could be several hours before getting the chance to eat again. Since my sporadic contractions were tolerable I decided to lay down and at 5:30AM my contractions stopped. I ended up falling asleep. When I woke up to realize that was false labor I felt so guilty that my parents drove over in the middle of the night. Since we knew I could go into labor any moment though we decided it’d be best for Luke to stay at their house until baby arrived.

My last day of pregnancy: 10/30

This whole day I had so much mom guilt… I felt guilty Luke wasn’t with us, that he was missing daycare, and we’d miss Halloween together. To get my mind off things I decided to get out of the house even though all I wanted to do was lay down because the pelvic pressure from the baby being so low was unbearably uncomfortable. Josh had an appointment in the Mission so I decided to go with him. While he was at his appointment I went to Stonemill Matcha to enjoy a black sesame latte alone. After his appointment, we grabbed lunch together at Tacolicious which was our first date night restaurant. Since this was a rare instance where we had uninterrupted time (parent toddlers understand)… we got to talk. It was at this lunch we randomly decided what our baby’s name would be. So looking back, I’m grateful we had this day to ourselves and believe it was meant to be.

That following night, I started getting contractions again at 9PM but because of my previous false labor I didn’t think anything of it and thought the baby was playing tricks on me. I felt a lot of tightness and soreness around my right pelvic though so watched YouTube videos of pelvic stretches and did them to ease the discomfort. After stretching and feeling relief, I went to bed.

The start of real labor: 10/31, 2AM

At 2AM I woke up to contractions. The contractions felt more intense compared to the previous night but were tolerable so I quietly breathed through them in bed, trying to not wake Josh up. At 2:20AM the contractions progressed to every 5-minutes apart and got increasingly more painful. At 3:30AM I suddenly heard a “pop” sound inside me as if something burst, so rushed to the bathroom and my mucus plug fell out and my water broke. Even though the doctor said to head to the hospital if your water breaks, I felt like I had time and felt really relaxed… So I sat on the toilet with my water leaking (it was like a constant trickle) and called the hospital to confirm.

At 3:50AM Josh woke up from me talking on the phone and knew it was go-time. He immediately started packing the car with our hospital bag, snacks and my breastfeeding pillow. By 4AM my contractions were happening every 4-minutes apart. We were out the door at 4:20AM and by 4:25AM my contractions expedited to every 2-minutes apart, with the pain intensity increasing quickly. Looking back, I think doing the pelvic stretches helped start my labor because I think I helped make space for the baby to start descending.

On the drive to the hospital, I thought how ironic it was that I was going to the hospital again at 4AM (like last time) but this time was grateful since there was absolutely no traffic and my labor was quickly progressing. On the drive to the hospital in-between my contractions I managed to eat bread, because I did not want to be hungry while in labor and you can’t eat after getting the epidural.

At the hospital: 10/31, 4:35AM

When I arrived at the hospital and got out of the car a worker immediately saw me and came over with a wheelchair. I joked to him that the last time I was in labor it was COVID times so no-one was around and I was laboring by myself in the hospital lobby, and had no idea where to go. Since my contractions were also more bearable this time, I was able to talk to the staff, walk, and even make jokes in-between my contractions. This experience was already felt much better than my first.

With my first born, since my baby was in a posterior position (aka sunny-side up/back labor) my contraction pain was significantly worse and erupted my whole body. This time the baby was in the optimal position (head-down, anterior where baby’s back is against my stomach) so the contractions felt way different, less painful, and were concentrated around my stomach area. It felt like intense cramps, with pain that was tolerable through breathing (I highly recommend watching lamaze breathing techniques to prepare for labor). In between the contractions I felt normal and could actually do things like walk. With my first born the back labor pain was constant to the point where I had to be on hands and knees the whole time, and whenever I had a contraction my entire body shook and my back felt like it was on fire. I remember shivering and shaking in uncontrollable pain but this time the contractions were so much more bearable that it put me in a much better mood since it wasn’t nearly as painful.

During triage I was 4cm dilated and labored through the contractions alone by breathing through them. Anytime the nurse asked me to do something (like step on the scale), I was able to get up unassisted (in-between my contractions) and do everything independently. The fact that this labor was so much smoother and that I could handle everything without help made me feel so empowered. It being Halloween also made the whole day feel humorous, like this baby played trick-or-treat on me with false labor and waited until Halloween to be born. I felt great, relaxed, and felt pumped to experience it all again and meet my baby soon. At 5:30AM (1-hour after arriving at the hospital) I got admitted into the labor and delivery room. Although I felt like I could handle the contractions and wait longer, they suggested I get the epidural to rest. I was 6cm dilated at this point, and because everything was progressing naturally and at a steady pace the nurses left us alone after I got the epidural.

Even with the epidural I could still feel the pressure of everything and move my legs and wiggle my toes. When the nurse checked in on me to move positions I was even able to move myself, primarily with my arm strength. The nurse commented “wow, you’re strong” and hearing that motivated me. I felt completely in control because I could feel what was happening to my body, but it was painless. I attempted to sleep but couldn’t because of all the machines beeping plus the anticipation of giving birth soon, so I laid there in my thoughts taking this moment in.

The birth! 10/31, 11:30AM

At 11:30AM I suddenly felt an intense desire to push and like my butt was about to split open so called the help button. When the nurses arrived I joked and said, “I’ve been clenching my butt cheeks together for ya’ll” (previously they mentioned having the urge to poop was an indicator of being fully dilated). When the staff peeped under my blanket they confirmed, “yup, you’re fully dilated, it’s time to push”!

I asked to use a mirror to help me push so they wheeled one over. Even though they say your 2nd baby comes flying out, I ended up pushing for 30-minutes because the baby’s shoulder was in an awkward position. I was able to feel every contraction so told the staff when the next contraction was coming since you push during each contraction. I felt completely empowered, supported, and in control. With each contraction, the staff motivated me and helped me sit up to push. In between contractions we would chat and I even showed them my pregnancy Halloween costume which gave everyone a good laugh. I was also in no rush to push since I didn’t want to tear so took my time pushing. It was overall a great and peaceful experience. My only regret was not having music on for the vibes haha.

When I started crowning they asked if I wanted to touch the baby’s head. I of course said yes, so reached down to touch the baby’s head and it felt slimy haha. After the final push the baby came out and got placed on my bare chest letting out a soft cry. I felt an overwhelming sensation of relief, awe and bliss. Since Josh didn’t want to cut the cord, I cut the cord myself. It felt like cutting a thin rubber hose. Having so much control during my labor and delivery, and managing so much of it independently was so empowering. I was in absolute awe of the experience and felt like a badass.

Since it was my 2nd time and I knew what to expect I felt way more prepared and excited to experience it again, especially to compare it to my first birth. I love feeling challenged and also went into this birth with the mentality of being in a competition with myself against my first labor/delivery. Since I didn’t have back labor this time, I was also excited to experience what a more normal labor and delivery felt like. This time, everything felt so much more smooth (first birth story here) and I was so relaxed throughout the experience. I was so grateful baby was in the optimal position making things less painful, grateful I progressed naturally and didn’t need any assistance (last time I got Pitocin after the epidural), and grateful I had a staff to crack jokes with about having a Halloween baby (which I tried to avoid). I also barely tore this time making recovery so much better and faster.

All in all my labor and delivery was so positive and I could not have imagined it going any better. Giving birth is one of the most magical and empowering experiences a woman will ever have. It truly is a miracle and you can’t help but think “I cannot believe I grew this human inside me, and that this baby came out of me”, I had such a positive birth experience that afterwards I even thought “I could totally do that again” haha. I’m so thankful and blessed to have my healthy Halloween baby by my side . 🙂